"Everyday is another chance to make it."

Yesterday was Sunday.

Yesterday was Easter.

Yesterday was the Third day. 

He is gone. 

The tomb is empty.

He is gone.

Sadness turns into fearful expectancy.

He is gone.

People can't believe it.

But he is gone.

Jesus died. Jesus rose. Jesus rose even higher, after telling us what to do.

Jesus woke up from death's nightmare and now we have him forever.

Thank you Jesus, for everyday is another chance to make it

closer to you.

"Everyday is another chance to make..."

Today is Saturday.

Today is the Saturday that Jesus is dead. 

And A LOT of people have lost all hope. All of it.

They saw the person that would lift them out of the scum of the earth hang there.

Just bleed and hang there like a rag.

"All this time we spent and it ends like this."

But the curtain split in two, exposing the Holy of Holies for everyone to see. 

But the earth shook.

But.

Now what?

"Everyday is another chance to..."

Everyday is another chance to... put Jesus on the cross again.

Like we did Yesterday, Good Friday.

Not so Good of a Friday for some. 

But It will be good. Soon.

Lets stop crucifying Him again and again and again with our ignorance.

It will be so GOOD. Soon.

"Everyday is another chance..."

Today was Thursday.

Today was the Thursday of a whole lot of things.

Its supper time and there is a load of unleavened bread.

A WHOLE  LOT. 

I don't know a whole lot about this entire Passover meal thing, but I did look up some stuff and now I am even more clueless.

The Thursday before Jesus' death was the beginning of Passover, which is a memorial ceremony of how God saved the Jews from the Egyptians. You know, you've seen The Prince of Egypt. (When you believe.... YEAH.)

However, Jesus makes this meal special. Its technically called a Seder meal, which has a whole lot of foods that represent a whole lot of things, and I need to stop saying the word "whole."

All I'm saying is that this is pretty significant. 

But Jesus uses this opportunity to make a new memorial. We now do this in remembrance of Him. 

And now, it should be even more significant.

You've heard this before. Break the bread, eat it, think of Jesus on the cross. Bless the juice, drink, and think of Jesus' blood.

Thats pretty gross. But hey, we remember.

Yep. We really do remember, and we really do feel... we feel.... so... we feel so.... 

Hmm, bloody and bready? 

Thats a lovely remembrance picture. 

But no no no no nooo. Look at what happens next.

Jesus prays in Gethsemane. Prays so hard and is in such anxiety that our mere stress looks like a tickle.

One of his followers, his friend, expresses in so many steps that 30 pieces of metal are better than he is with a kiss.

He gets arrested, accused of things he, and the rest of the people pointing their fingers, knew he didn't do.

He is not recognized, denied 3 times.

And the righteous "Council" striked him in the face.

Yep. Lets remember him now.

I tried to make a Passover meal. I failed. I did however make a meal of some sort. It felt good to make something healthy, worthy of eating.

But its hard to remember when you forget what you were remembering in the first place.

Meal, Arrest, and Trial.

I must confess, thats a hefty dinner.

"Everyday is another..."

Today is Wednesday.

Today is the Wednesday when Jesus did nothing. 

Wait.

What? 

Apparently, he did nothing. 

And apparently I am an orange.

I think there is more to nothing.

Continuing with the idea of Passion Week, now is about the time when Jesus speaks of things that are to come, the closing of the age that is, and the signs that will show it.

Ok, now that is way over my head. 

The age to come? What age is that and what is an age?!

The signs of Jesus coming back? Does that mean destruction or does that mean I will be in heaven; am I going to heaven?

The word "tribulation" is said in Matthew, and we all know what that means.

No, not really. I have no idea. 

I guess it means trouble of some sort. Jesus says: "they will deliver you up to tribulation and put you to death, and you will be hated by all nations for my sake."

Oh, ok. Got it.

Something to look forward to.

Now, I am not trying to be insensitive. I am actually just trying to be more sensitive to what all this is saying, but it is hard to understand. 

I heard recently that maybe the age to come has already passed, and that all the signs occurred. And that the destruction of the temple that Jesus talks about in here was the destruction that happened already. 

All this to say that I don't find the facts important. Not at all.

But Yes, we are to take heed of what Jesus is telling us to do.

Do you know what he is saying?

He is telling us to STAY AWAKE because we do not know when all this is coming, if it is during our time.

Just STAY AWAKE.

But that is not the part that has got me.

Reading through all this, I realized that I am going to die.

I am going to be dead. A corpse. A body without biological life. Without physical breath. Without blood flowing through it. Without movement.

And I must confess, it terrifies me to think of death, because it will become me.

I am not ready to die. The idea of this blackness, this loneliness that crushes your chest because it is so powerful fills me with terror.

Terror like that of when you don't know what is 

behind the closet door

under the bed

below your feet in the water

across, through the window

beyond the darkness in the hallway

inside the hole in the wall

in the dark corner of the room

in the thoughts of people

in the deep caverns of your mind

in the urgent desires of your heart.

I am afraid of death, because I still have doubt.

But death didn't stop Jesus.

Doubt left him.

 

Sunday's ah-comin'... 

"Everyday is..."

Today is Tuesday.

Today is the Tuesday that Jesus spoke about the Pharisees and scribes.

And called them all hypocrites, liars, gluttons, prideful: Undeserving.

'Its so sad for you, you who think its all about how you look next to God rather than how you feel bowing at his feet. "You shut the kingdom of heaven in people's faces. For you neither enter yourselves not allow those who would enter to go in." '

Jesus was not a little mad, he was furious. 

You know how you get when you are more than mad. It seems like the blood inside of you raises its temperature and the heat makes even more mad. I can't imagine how hot Jesus' blood got.

And to think it was those same religious hypocrites who would expose that same blood.

I think I am and I know I have seen and been around people who are just like those leaders Jesus is talking about.

I am not saying they (the people I know and myself included) do things that are "stumbling blocks"... blah blah blah with that saying.

I am saying that we do not take things seriously.

Its really still all about us.

even if you go give money away to people who need it to buy food, clothes, pay rent or support their children. 

even if you spend your time doing things for others.

even if you just sit there and think you were productive.

I don't really know where I am going with this. But I do know that I want to know what happened every single day before Jesus is brought back to life.

Brought back to life. I don't like how that doesn't shock me, or anyone, anymore.

"Everyday..."

I don't know how to celebrate easter.

Easter. What does that mean?

Lets see:

1. An annual Christian festival in commemoration of the resurrection of Jesus Christ, observed on the first Sunday after the first full moon after the vernal equinox [....]

Origins: Before 900, Ester, Ostern; original name of a goddess and her festival; akin to East.

Thank you dictionary.com. 

Goo.

So where are the bunnies, and the pastel colors, and....oh, and the plethora of chocolates?

I get so confused as to how we can associate the resurrected God/man and peeps.

Now before you get all defensive on how easter egg hunts are for the children to enjoy the holiday, let me explain where I am going.

Yesterday was Sunday, and this week is Passion week.

Yesterday was the Sunday in which Christ makes his "triumphal entry," making it Palm Sunday, the day he enters the town he is to be convicted in with crowds and crowds of people laying down their cloaks and branches of palms and trees in front of his path in adoration. Yeah, adoration.

Today is Monday. 

The Monday of Jesus' eventful week he overturns the tables full of money and drives out the men exchanging coins and pigeons in the temple.

He tells everyone, quoting  an Isaiah scripture: " 'My house is a house of prayer,' and you make it a den of robbers."

During the same time, Jesus "curses" a fig tree he wanted to eat from but had no fruit on its branches to take.

He wasn't mad at it, he didn't even take offense that this plant, in his presence, didn't automatically sprout figs to provide for his hunger.

But he does it anyway and does it to show his followers that the religiously blind will never amount to anything for themselves, just like that fig tree.

What I found more interesting is that he spoke of prayer in both separate events, just as much as he talked about the Pharisees who were going to wither away like the perfectly fine fig tree who wasn't even in season to produce its fruit.

Prayer is one of the first things Jesus talks about during his week in Jerusalem before he dies.

I don't know how to celebrate Easter, mainly because my family was never into doing what American's do on this day, and when we got the hint, we started to hide plastic eggs in our backyard for my younger sisters, (and sometimes myself... hey, i like chocolate too.)

I have found that Passion week is more intense than we believe it is. 

And that Easter is a much more profound culmination of events than we make it to be.

I love easter, its beautiful, and I have always enjoyed the small get-togethers and moments of laughter and peace on these Sundays with both friends and family.

But I must confess, I just don't know.